Hey, good news and bad news. My best friend said yes! We're dating now?? I'm still adjusting. I feel like i'm in a dream, this is really hard to adjust to. I guess just because i'm not used to being like. in a happy relationship?? I DON'T KNOW?? It feels weird dating women again I guess. That's the tricky thing though because the relationship with my boyfriend was happy.. is happy.. I was going to break up with him today but he texted me "22/2/22!!!! THIS EXACT DATE WONT HAPPEN FOR ANOTHER 200 YRS soi hope whatever u are doing is fun." and that made me sad, he's trying really hard to keep us together but I just can't. I haven't been texting my best friend. Girlfriend. I CAN CALL HIM MY GIRLFRIEND NOW OH MY GOD. Sorry. That feels so weird to say. I've haven't been texting my GIRLFRIEND either, because i'm just like, I don't even know. It doesn't feel real. And I don't know what to say to him. Eventually i'll have to tell him everything, right? Maybe? This is the week i'm meant to be focusing on studying ugh and i'm stressing my mind out over relationships. There's just so much I have to do and stop and cut off, and I guess I wasn't really ready to start dating him, it was a stupid drunk confession, but I really want him and i'm willing to try. (gag). God, IDK. Dying my hair purple on Thursday, good news!! There's not a lot of that in this journal, well I guess dating your best friend is good news, I don't know. By the way, he told me that he had a dream that I kissed him. I'll just copy and paste the message here because it made me giggle a bit, but I was also like.. damn. "i just gotta get something off my chest before we start talking again cause its been bothering me since second year n i know you might laugh but, its unavoidable if i dont want to fuck up like last time. the reason i stopped talking to you was cause i had a dream we kissed. it really scared me, maybe cause it scared me to know i was really gay, to desire things like that. it doesnt excuse how i was, n i hope you can still hold me accountable if it happens again, n it wont. i really do hope you forgive me for how i was, maybe youll find it funny, which would be better honestly. thank you for liking me, for what its worth." That's it. Hopefully I figure this out soon. Bye!